Too cool for school.

I need to update this more so that I’m not playing an endless game of catch up. Let’s see…

Work has been going well. I asked all of my classes what stereotypes French people have for Americans. I even told them that I was the one time they could get away with badmouthing Americans in front of me. I was shocked at how little animosity they have for Americans…in fact, it was quite the contrary. The worst things I heard were “Zey eat a lot of ze fast food,” or “Zey are…euh…couch potato!” which I thought was pretty funny actually. It made me feel bad about all the annoying comments I got from Americans when I told them I was coming to France, like “Remind them who helped them out in the war!” (What about the Revolutionary War, doofus?) Or, “Well I hope you’ll shower more than the French do.” Why do Americans like to hate on the French? There are tons of French stereotypes; you know it as well as I do. For example, in one of my favorite childhood Christmas films, Home Alone (which oddly enough is called “Maman, J'ai Raté L'avion” – “Mom, I Missed the Plane” – in French), Buzz says, “French babes don’t shave their pits!” We should be what the French call “Les incompetents”, but they actually do seem to like us. Maybe Obama’s international popularity has something to do with this.

My kids love all things American for the most part (except Lady Gaga. They don’t seem to be fans for some reason…). They watch almost only American TV shows and listen to a LOT of American music. It’s kind of an interesting perspective to have, being in their school. I’m like some kind of really cool Martian that they are intimidated by but seem very impressed with. I wish my students in the U.S. felt that way too, haha.

One of the English teachers has had jury duty for the last couple of weeks, so there has been a substitute filling in, who is around my age, Leslie. It’s been interesting talking to someone my age and who also just finished studying to be a teacher. It’s so different here! For example, the French Ministry of Education takes count of how many teachers and substitutes will be needed, and ONLY certifies that many. As opposed to back home, where anyone who qualifies is certified and then we just have to fend for ourselves in the workforce, French teachers are actually placed where they are needed. Not sure which way is better...

It’s also still something I am getting used to that teachers all share classrooms. The high school actually functions a lot more like a university. Teachers have different schedules, and switch rooms accordingly. If a teacher is only sick for a day, they just cancel class. Classes run Monday through Saturday, with classes only in the morning on Wednesdays and Saturdays. Teachers here are only paid for the eighteen hours a week they spend in front of the class, and then other than that are not expected to be at school. When I student taught I learned that in the U.S. you are contracted to be at school from around 7 AM (about 30 minutes before school starts) to help students before school if they need it. Leaving right after school is frowned upon in American schools, and often times being able to coach a sport or being willing to run a club is preferred, which equals even more time at school. On top of that, we still have to lesson plan, grade papers, do parent-teacher conferences, curriculum meetings; the list goes on and on. However, here school is much more academic and less about socializing. There is no prom, or clubs, very few team sports. The focus is entirely on the Baccalaureate which they need to do well on to go to college (and preferably a good one, because the clout of their University really does matter when looking for jobs here). Back home, a kid can go to college with no idea what they want to do. Here in France, that is not the case. Academic competition is pretty cutthroat, and that follows you as you go on to enter the workforce.

There are also no clocks in the classrooms, which drives me nuts if I forget my watch. It is also the first time I have used an actual chalkboard to teach. It’s old school. Pun intended. The heaters don't work extremely well either, so it can be pretty cold in certain rooms. They also don't have computers in every room (only in the teachers' room) like you see back home. There is maybe a TV and VCR/DVD but technology just isn't big in French education.

I am soaking up as much cultural information as I can, and am really enjoying myself. I saw my painter friends, Cerb and Michel again this week. I was working on the computer and I heard them say, “C’est Kelly!” I chatted with them for a while. Cerb asked me if we use “yaoo” in the States. I was like..er.. I don’t think so…until I realized he was saying "Yahoo." Sometimes the fact that the French don’t pronounce "h’s" makes communication really difficult! You can’t hear the difference between “angry” and “hungry” at all when they say it. I made my kids repeat the two after me in class last week, exaggerating the “h” sound on hungry. I’m pretty sure I made them spit all over each other but they were laughing a lot.

Being a language assistant is perfect because it’s everything I like about teaching minus grading piles of papers every night. I’m really enjoying what my professors told me would be the most laid back year of my life. It’s weird after five years of an intense college schedule. Now it’s like I hardly have anything to worry about and I’m learning to relax. I didn't have to teach one of my classes today, and was told I don't need to teach my last class on Thursday or Friday. Still no full work week! No wonder I'm so relaxed.

Another day, another Euro

So, at my school I get a reduced lunch for a measly 2.50 Euro. Which is still $3.40, but for a meal here it's amazingly cheap. It comes with a soup/salad, main dish, yogurt or cheese, and fruit or dessert. So, I went to school earlier than normal to take advantage of this deal. But, I got there later than intended, so when I got to the teacher's lounge with my tray, there was literally NO ONE that I knew. Everyone looked at me when I walked in so I kind of panicked and just made a really fast judgement call on who was the least intimidating. Two guys in their late twenties to early thirties won, so they got stuck with me. It wasn't until I was sitting down that I noticed their paint splattered clothes. They were definitely not teachers. Turns out I sat down with two painters who were doing work on the school...lol. But Michel and Cerb were extremely nice and chatted the whole lunch hour with me in French about America, France, what I should see while I'm here, etc. They were good lunchtime company.

Then, later, I met one of the classes I have yet to meet because of the strikes, then the teacher was sick, and then there was a bank holiday. I have yet to work a full 12 hours a week...*knock on wood*. I was in the middle of introducing myself to the class of about 24 students when a kid called out really loudly "You are very beautiful!" in a really thick French accent. This caused the rest of the class to erupt with laughter and me to blush like crazy. I know it's a compliment but I felt really awkward. Even the teacher laughed at me. :-/

Odile gives me a ride to the train station after school everyday, and I always blabber away in French with her. She is honestly one of the nicest people I have ever met. She invited me to come over and cook an American meal for her sometime. I'm thinking macaroni and cheese. Another teacher was saying that they should take me on a daytrip to Champagne. I love how nice everyone is at my school. A lot of them were language assistants in England so they know what it's like and take it upon themselves to make sure I experience France while I'm here. I'm very lucky.

I am very excited for this weekend for two reasons:

1. On Saturday night I get to eat for free at Mary. They specialize in gelato but they offered a free Italian meal from their new menu for twenty Yelpers, and I got in. Score! Plus, I'm excited to meet and rub elbows with other Paris Yelpers. It's still a really small community, and I have some free time so I'd love to get more involved. Plus, the more French friends I have = the more French I speak = the better I do on my French exams. It's win-win-win.

2. After my free dinner, I am joining some of my fellow language assistants on a party boat on the Seine. I always see boats on the river when I walk by and I have been dying to be on one. We took a boat tour when I studied abroad last summer but this will be so much better because A. I don't have to pretend to listen to a tour guide and B. it's at night and drinks and dancing are involved.

Right now I am very happy to be here. Now I just need to get paid again so I can figure out what in the world I'm going to do for Christmas.

Reasons why living in France has made me a better person already:

1. Exercise. Not only have I been running (I can't give France the credit for that), but I walk a lot more than I would in the states.

2. Also, it's probably doing wonders for my carbon footprint that I don't have a car and use public transportation, unplug everything in my room besides the fridge when I'm not using it, and still don't eat meat. I don't think I will ever be better for the environment than I am right now.

3. Also good for the environment, I take faster showers. My college roommates know that I can take a while in there. For one thing, I have a TON of curly hair to work through with conditioner, but besides that, it is just pleasant being in a hot shower. Here, with my tiny water heater, I have fifteen minutes TOPS before I run out. That, combined with the fact that my shower is a human-sized glass cubicle, is not helping me in the leg shaving department. Good thing I don't have anyone to impress here anyway. Ha. Now I'M the French stereotype. Some French people even turn off the water while they lather or any other shower activity that doesn't require the water running. I miss long, luxurious showers. This one might fall by the wayside when I get back to the states. We'll see.

4. Being away from home has caused me to keep one eye on World news, just to stay up to date with what is going on back home. I check BBC news every morning when I wake up. I don't think I've ever been so aware of what's going on in the world. I hope I keep this habit when I return home. I also decided that in my [magical hypothetical future] classroom I will start each class period with World News, or if I teach French, I will focus on Europe. After teaching here, American students seem pretty oblivious to the rest of the world. It's not entirely their fault, our media focuses primarily on the U.S. That's why I like BBC news so much.

5. I can tell my French is getting stronger because I no longer feel like a deaf mute. When I saw Antoine last week he told me he can tell it's getting better. Being the whole purpose of this experience, it makes me very happy.

6. With all of the delays, paperwork, surprises, and irritations I have had to deal with, I feel like I am learning to roll with the punches, pick my battles, and let what I can't control go. Example of a surprise: I was babysitting for a new family (two boys, 6 and 9) this weekend for the first time. When I told them to go put on their pajamas, one came flying out of the bathroom toward me completely naked save for a book he was holding over his crotch region, screaming his head off. My response was to laugh and say, "Go get your pajamas on, you dork." He just giggled like crazy and ran back to the bathroom. On his return trip I realized he had on tighty whities, thank God. Kids are so funny. I am quickly getting used to boys. They are SO different from the girls I used to babysit for. Good experience to have though.

7. To be continued...

Off to bed, have to teach bright and early (or dark and early, thanks to Daylight Savings).

TRAVEL FEST 99!

I just booked tickets to Athens, Berlin, and Rome for February!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

C'est ma vie.

Now that the vacation is over along with the strikes and protests, my life has gained some sense of normalcy. I say some because tomorrow is a bank holiday so there is no school, and Friday I get to go in late because they are taking an exam and I'm not needed in the morning. We'll see if I ever work my full 12 hours a week, but I'm pretty okay with that.

If anyone is reading this as a guide to what your experience will be in this program, you should probably stop now. From what I have heard from my other assistant friends, everyone's experience is drastically different. I work with seven different teachers, so what I do depends on them. For some, they send me four to six students, and I can literally teach them whatever I want and my only real goal is to get them speaking English as much as possible. For others I get fifteen students at a time, and still others I get one at a time. At orientation we are not supposed to have more than eight at a time, but I don't mind because my big groups are really great kids. For the terminale (which sounds like they are dying but is actually the equivalent of our high school seniors), I take them one by one and show them a "document" (either a photo or a phrase). They get ten minutes to study it and take notes to prepare, and then ten minutes to talk to me about the photo. This is really easy, but I prefer teaching bigger groups. It's nice too because I can reuse my lesson plans because the groups change every week. The kids have all been really good save for that some of them seem to be terrified of speaking English with me (because I'm soooo intimidating, clearly). Until yesterday that is. For some reason one of the teachers gave me four boys at a time who clearly should not have been put together. They were obnoxious as hell and kept egging each other on. During introductions they told me that they "like women." Later when I was trying to talk about differences between the US and France one said "I like ze US because it's easy to get ze women in your bed." Le sigh. I was pretty happy when that class was over. My other classes were great though. When I told one class of fifteen that I live in LA (I still show them Michigan on the map, I haven't forgotten where I came from :), and that my boyfriend works in Hollywood, they all gasped like I'm the coolest thing since sliced bread. This of course leads to ridiculous questions like "Do you know Beyonce?"

After introducing myself, I asked my kids if they had any questions for me. One kid said really quietly "Oui, es tu celebataire?" which means "Yes, are you single?" I said, "Oh, and in case you were wondering, I DO understand some French even though I won't speak it with you." All the kids laughed including the one who said it even though his face turned bright red.

I talked a lot about stereotypes of the US and French kids seem obsessed with the idea of cheerleaders. They call them "pom pom girls" and several kids have asked me if I was one while in school. I was also a little surprised to find out that they didn't know the phrase "trick-or-treat." France has a lot of holidays, but I just can't imagine my life without having gone door to door and asking for candy dressed up as Xena Warrior Princess.

When asked about the differences between the US and France, one kid said that in the US people would think French men are gay for dressing nicely. He is probably right. In a country where homosexuality is already more (although not completely) accepted than the US, a man wearing a scarf or a murse (man purse if you're unfamiliar with the term) is not assumed to be gay. Men are almost always dressed impeccably and it's normal here. Really though, much like my cell phone, my gaydar is just not functional in Europe. I thought that was an interesting cultural difference to note.

I had my students make me a list of French music to check out. I'm excited to give them a whirl.

Aside from school and babysitting, it looks like I won't be able to come home for Christmas this year. My Sicilian family that I have never met invited me to join them for the holiday, and my host mom from last summer invited me back to Nice. No white Christmas for me, but it should be a memorable one either way.

Marie, the baguettes! Hurry up!

I just have to share this because I think it's adorable. I was walking back to my place today and I had a baguette in my hand. As I stood waiting to cross the street I felt a little tug on it. I looked down and there was a little boy standing behind me with his mom. When I looked at him he had a huge smile plastered on his face, and he just grinned up at me as if to say "I just had to touch it." It was really freaking cute.

Also, Sandra turned me on to sushi. I get one that is basically rice, cream cheese, and chives. It is fantastic. I also learned that the French for "chopsticks" is BAGUETTES. It blew my mind.

So, I have been trying to take different ways home to expand my territory. YesterdayI got out at the Cardinal Lemoine stop and THANK GOD. I wanted bread and I saw a bright pink bakery across the street. I had enough change for a baguette and an eclair. I hadn't had an eclair since I got to France, so I figured, what the hell? OH. MY. GOD. The filling was gooey creamy chocolate (pudding almost), and it was covered in a thick layer of divine dark chocolate frosting. Seriously, it might have been the best thing I've ever eaten. Not only that, but the baguette was perfect. Crispy on the outside, pillowy soft on the inside. I was impressed, so I Googled the bakery. Turns out that they won second place this year in the Grand Prix de la Baguette de Tradition Française de la Ville de Paris. That's impressive when the connoisseurs of baguettes, (a.k.a. Parisiens) vote you number two in the city. I was so proud of myself for my newly found baguette tasting skills. Apparently I know a good baguette when I eat one. It is dangerous that I live so close to this place. They also have some interesting flavors like coconut croissants and pistachio eclairs. It's a good thing I have to climb seven flights of stairs at least once a day.

As an afterthought, on my way home I saw a Frenchmen riding a bike wearing a beret and carrying a baguette in his bike basket. Mental snapshot. :)